There will always be pitfalls in situations. It can have dire consequences that last for days or weeks. To avoid falling into those pitfalls, do’s and don’ts are sometimes properly laid down. The best man toast is not an exception to this. Always write the bestman speech days ahead, never try to be spontaneous with it.
In terms of contents:
It is a family affair, the bestman speech should be wholesome! Make the speech easy to understand, light and funny. It should not contain lewd and obscene topics. It must be free from any cursing. There is a high likelihood that innocent children of tender age will be around. Older guests will not appreciate those topics or behavior. When it comes to talking about the characteristics of the groom or the bride, withhold any embarrassing information such as alcohol problems, mental illness or any criminal record. Wedding receptions are not the proper venue for talking about those issues. It will only cause embarrassment on the newly married couple on their special day. Never forget to thank the bride, the groom, their parents and the guests.
In terms of length:
Ideally, speeches should be kept at around five minutes and should not last beyond 10 minutes. It is not a lecture about the lives of the groom, the bride and the bestman!
! The celebration comes to a pause because the guests have to listen to the speech. Neither should it be too short that the guest will fail to catch and realize that the bestman is already giving his speech. It will look like somebody standing up, mumbling a few words and sitting down again.
In terms of delivery:
Don’t drink too much before making the speech. Too much alcohol gives one a lose tongue, makes on forget things or worse, it can make you vomit in front of everyone. Take the time to say the speech but do not speak to slow or the guest will simply lose interest and become impatient. Don’t speak to fast or you’ll sound like you are trying out the latest hiphop record. Speak in a well-modulated voice. Do not shout. Do not eat your words. Do practice facial expressions and hand gestures days or hours before the speech. This helps communicate to the guests. There are times in speeches wherein, you would not know where to put your hands, practicing hand gestures will erase all that awkwardness during the speech. Do not be too nervous. People do not want to listen to nervous people. They end up talking to people next to them. Sometimes, this causes the speaker to become more nervous. It is a vicious cycle!
These are just some do’s and don’ts regarding the bestman speech. Experience is a great teacher, it tells people what things to do and not to do especially with bestman speeches.